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Monday, September 9, 2013

Blogtember: A skeptical ESFJ

Last week I mentioned that some of the Blogtember posts have REALLY been hitting home.  When you ask the Universe for some guidance, it will give you guidance, just in ways you don't quite see, and today's prompt is no joke.

A little back story: a few weeks ago, C and I went to dinner with a good friend of mine and her good friend, who I had met once before.  We had a really great conversation over dinner which lead to her recommending to me a book called "Do What You Are".  She mentioned that she had been in a job for years that she was, for the most part, happy doing, but something was off, and lo and behold, this book showed that her personality was ill fitted for the work she was doing, and it totally changed her perspective on careers and jobs.  She recommended I check it out, take the personality test, and see where it guides me.  I bought the book used on Amazon, and have slowly been working through it the past few weeks.  Let me tell you, figuring out your personality is not black and white!

I mentioned this book to Jillian last week, and then had to laugh when I saw that today's prompt was taking an online version of the personality test.  What are the odds?!

Here are my results:

Extravert(44%)  Sensing(12%)  Feeling(62%)  Judging(56%)
  • You have moderate preference of Extraversion over Introversion (44%)
  • You have slight preference of Sensing over Intuition (12%)
  • You have distinctive preference of Feeling over Thinking (62%)
  • You have moderate preference of Judging over Perceiving (56%)
Before I go into details, what I find really humorous about this is that when I first took the test via the book, I thought I was one personality type.  Then, as the book suggests, I looked at the things that I was more or less halfway on (Sensing/Intuition, Judging/Perceiving) and swapped sides, and looked at that personality, and thought it was mostly fitting but not 100%.  I read both types to two friends, looking for their input, and both said, without a doubt, I was type #2, which shocked me.  I take the personality test online and lo and behold, type #2.

Here are a few highlights:

  • Guardians of birthdays, holidays and celebrations, ESFJs are generous entertainers. They enjoy and joyfully observe traditions and are liberal in giving, especially where custom prescribes.

Uh, yeah.  As my family and close friends know, my birthday is celebrated all March long.  I love all holidays as well, and can easily turn anything into a celebration.  (I went to yoga today? Celebratory cronuts for everyone!)

  • ESFJs enjoy being in charge. They see problems clearly and delegate easily, work hard and play with zest. ESFJs, as do most SJs, bear strong allegiance to rights of seniority. They willingly provide service (which embodies life's meaning) and expect the same from others.

There is a reason why I was president of my high school Student Council.  This would also explain my desire to be involved in committees and groups.
  • An ESFJ at odds with self is a remarkable sight. When a decision must be made, especially one involving the risk of conflict (abhorrent to ESFJs), there ensues an in-house wrestling match between the aforementioned black-and-white Values and the Nemesis of Discord. The contender pits self against self, once firmly deciding with the Right, then switching to Prudence to forestall hostilities, countered by unswerving Values, ad exhaustium, winner take all.

In lamens terms, I really struggle with deciding where to go out to eat on a weekly basis. I am my own worst enemy.

My journey on discovering my personality and learning my strengths and weaknesses has been really fascinating.  I'm taking is super slow with the book, often rereading sections or chapters to make sure I'm really understanding things, and its been enlightening.  It has also helped me recognize personality traits in others, and helped me slowly become much more understanding and empathetic.  If you haven't taken the online test, I highly recommend it.  Totally worth your time.

Now, what to eat for lunch...


  1. I got the same result and mine was pretty accurate for me too. I also am my own worst enemy sometimes. Food related decisions also make me crazy. Glad to hear I am not the only one. :-)

    1. Right?! There are too many options! Us ESFJ's have to stick together!

  2. ESFJ here too! I'm terrible at making food choices... Often looking at yelp for a new restaurant for HOURS... Then just settling on chipotle or something!

    1. Yelp is one of the greatest inventions and yet also one of the worst - too many options!

  3. I'm an ESFJ too! You kinda hit it on the with the whole can't decide where to eat for lunch thing. My boyfriend wants to strangle me every time he comes to visit because I can't make decisions! It's not my fault though. It's my personality haha.